Halfway Home

It has come to my attention that the average American toiletry is meant to last approximatley two and one-half months. You may be asking, "Andrew...why on earth do you know this?". And I would reply: As of two days ago, I have officially been living in Estonia for 5 months. Halfway done!! Before moving here, I packed two of every toiletry I normally use into my suitcase. You do the math. So now, you maybe be wondering what I am using to brush my teeth or clean my face. It's all Estonian. It took five months, but I am fully immersed into the cleansing rituals of an Estonian...well the cleansing rituals of an American living in Estonia, using products found here that remind him of the ones he brought...hmm. This, however, is not the only milestone of my halfway point. At this crossroads in my adventure, I can honestly say that I have been finally accepted, for the most part, into the culture and society here. I will elaborate shortly, but first I would like to set up a slight contrast.

I recently watched a documentary on television about the Kombai people living in Papau-New Guinea. It was an hour length program that followed the story of a British man (presumably an anthropologist and not just some crazy guy) attempting to infiltrate the Kombai society. To begin the journey, local guides from a "civilized" area on the island take our hero into the dense jungle to meet the Kombai. They are greeted by three armed and hostile men. The scene is extremely intense, but after some calm negotiating (through gestures of course, the British man cannot speak Kombai) and an offer of tobacco, he is no longer considered a threat. During this discussion, the Kombai men refuse to even look at our man except for the ones with the bows, they have a deadly glare. Eventually, one community (3 men, 5 women, and a slew of children) agree to let him stay with them at their tree-house home. He stays with them for two weeks. Everyday, he participates in food gathering and hunting as well as other daily rituals. For the most part, our hero is trying to be as "Kombai" as possible. After a week they allow him to sleep up in the house with them instead of on the ground below. Next, he starts hunting without shoes as the other men have always done. Apparently they considered him more of a child because his body is soft and he is clumsy and unskilled in the ways of Kombai men. At one point, the community plays a practical joke on their visitor by convincing him to put worms in his ears to clean out the wax. Taking it all in stride, the British man continues to impress his hosts. These scored points earn him some communal smoking time, hand shakes, shared laughter and some dancing. The culmination of his cultural indoctrination and acceptance came in the last few days of his stay. The Kombai adorned our hero's head with a band, hung a necklace about his chest, and peirced his nose (a spike through the center). Real Kombai men undergo a ritual in which they invert their penis (part of it goes back inside the body), and wrap the remainder in a makeshift loin-cloth. Our brave man attempted this, but after almost passing out, decided to make do with just the loin-cloth. Nevertheless, upon the British man's departure the Kombai community threw him a large feast, centered around the killing of one of their prized domestic pigs (this is a great honor). He had been formaly accepted into the society and culture of his hosts. Many tears were shed upon our man's departure...but I digress.

No wait!...! It only took him two weeks! It's taken me five...and almost everyone here speaks English! I've even gone to sauna (see previous blog about Estonian Saunas). Well...I am not going to complain. Good things come to those who wait, and my five months have paid off. The presumedly "cold and reserved" Estonians have finally begun to open up (well at least most of them). I now have many conversations with my Estonian friends that go beyond "What are you doing here?", "Aren't you cold?", "How long will you be staying?", or "Why did you come to Estonia?". Our repore has progressed beyond naming our differences to discovering our similarities. I am also slowly but surely learning the language, which scores me some points with the natives.

Today I returned to Tallinn from a trip with my choir to Viljandi (S. Estonia). We competed in the National Chamber Choir Competition (and took first place in our division!). On this 2.5 day long excursion, I became much closer with people in the choir...even talking with some whom I hadn't yet spoken too (imagine being in a choir where some people don't even speak to you). A few even caught me by surprise empathizing that it must get overwhelming at times to be constantly surround by a language and culture you hardly know. At the dance the second night, I impressed some of the singers by jokingly sharing some stereotypical line-dancing steps I'd picked up in high school. This led to a "forced" public demonstration the following morning... infront of the entire choir. It was a little like, "watch the monkey dance...dance monkey dance". I suppose this is better than having worms in your ears :) After a somewhat humiliating display, amongst giggles and laughter, I took a grand bow upon which I recieved much applause and cheering. Like our British friend, I too had finally been accepted.

I cannot say that it's been easy. At times I want to throw in the towel. This experience is one of the most diffucult/challenging things I've ever endured (don't ask me to explain it in words), and at the same time one of the most rewarding. An uphill struggle everyday, I feel like at this half-way point I've been handed a walking stick to help me keep my balance. If at times this does not seem to be enough, I will try to remember that its too cold here to wear a loin-cloth, so at least I won't be asked to undergo the respective rituals... Here's to five more wonder-filled months!

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